Monday Musings: Appreciating Her Style and Trusting Our Own
I’ve noticed a lot of maximalist dressing lately, and I’m enjoying seeing how women put it together. Mixed prints, beautiful textiles, layers of jewelry. Some have a real eye for combining things I’d never have thought to wear together, but when I try, I start taking things off.
I’m happier with an interesting shape, good fabric, and a little room to appreciate both. My eye goes toward an unusual collar, a jacket that swings, or a skirt that swishes when I walk. Those details give me a great deal of pleasure. Another woman might start with my finished outfit, then add a scarf and several bracelets before she feels that everything has finally come together.
Some of us grow more adventurous with clothes as we get older. Others find increasing pleasure in simplicity. Neither needs to be held up as the way we’re all supposed to do it.
What I find interesting is how differently taste develops in each of us. A woman who mixes prints beautifully may notice a color running through them that brings everything together. Someone who prefers a spare outfit may pay close attention to its proportions, or to the contrast between a substantial knit and a smooth fabric.
I enjoy seeing how another woman uses jewelry or pattern to make an outfit her own. She may show me something I’d like to try, even if I’d wear it quite differently.
That’s one of the nicest things about appreciating other women’s style. There’s always something to notice. We can borrow an idea, see familiar clothes differently, or simply enjoy what she’s put together.
We don’t have to turn every moment of admiration into a question about ourselves.
It’s easy to do, though. We see someone looking wonderful and begin wondering whether we’re playing it too safe, wearing too much, or somehow missing the point. An outfit we liked perfectly well can come under review without our having left the chair.
This is where trusting ourselves matters. We give our confidence very little room if we assume another woman’s choices are better than our own.
We’ve spent years choosing and wearing clothes. We know the pieces we look forward to putting on, the details that catch our eye, and the outfits that make us feel beautiful. Those responses are worth taking seriously.
And there’s still plenty to discover. We can try something unexpected, love it, and make room for it. We can also decide we preferred it on the woman who inspired us. That’s useful to know, too.
We can feel beautiful in our own way and be happy that the woman beside us has found hers.
In case you noticed, there was no Monday Musings last week because we were away in Kona. I took the opportunity to rest and really enjoyed doing very little.
I bought a book of short stories because that was about all the attention span I had, and a novel would have been asking too much.
The break was refreshing, and I enjoyed a little people watching. I’d expected to see more bright colors in Hawaii, but I didn’t notice nearly as much as I’d imagined. My own most-worn pieces turned out to be a black cotton skirt, black cotton gauze pants, a white tank, a white T-shirt, and a blue button-up. All very simple, all very neutral, and I was happy wearing them.
I’d also packed a sarong I bought on our trip to Bali and a bathing suit cover-up with bell sleeves and embroidery. The cover-up used to feel like me, but every time I wore it on this trip, I wished I had something simpler. When we got home, I put it in the donation bag.
I like having clothes for tropical trips that feel different from what I wear at home, but I still want to feel comfortable and like myself in them.
I’ve been thinking about that since we got home. Trusting our taste also means noticing when it changes. The cover-up used to feel like me, and now it doesn’t. I can appreciate the embroidery and bell sleeves without wanting to wear them anymore.
Do you ever admire another woman’s style and start questioning your own? What brings you back to feeling happy in what you love to wear?