Will You Still Need Me When I’m 64? (On the Topic of Anti-Aging)
Today is my sixty-fourth birthday. How the hell did that happen so fast? Today has me thinking about aging, making the most of the time we have, and how much I deplore the phrase “anti-aging.” I want to talk about pro-aging and the beauty of aging.
Last week I was approached by a brand (who will remain nameless) via my Instagram page, to try out and share what may very well be a lovely beauty product. And the moment I saw it was called an “anti-aging” face cream, I stopped reading. It was a hard stop. The phrase “anti-aging” is so offensive to me on a deep level. Do you feel the same way?
I want to look the best I can for my age, but I don’t want to lie about my age. I don’t want to anti-age. I am not ANTI-aging – I am pro-aging. When did we become a culture so obsessed with youth?
I recall always wanting to be older as I was growing up. To be older was to be cooler, more sophisticated, more interesting.
I’ll never forget the year I forgot how old I was. ALL YEAR I told everyone I was 38. I thought I was 38 deep in my soul. But then my birthday rolled around and I realized I was turning 38 and had robbed myself of my 37th year. Ha! Of course, I had tweenagers at the time, which probably accounts for a fair amount.
Now I am certainly a fan of products that can help soften the signs of aging on my skin. I’ve used Botox. I use Retin-A. I feel no shame about that. But it’s not because I want to deny that I am aging, or that aging is a dirty word or something we should hesitate or shy away from.
What a blessing it is to age – whatever that looks like for you. My mother died when she was nine years older than I am today. And on her deathbed, she spoke about regret that she had for things she had not done. And she was adventurous! But her time was cut short. Last year my daughter climbed Mount Kilimanjaro in honor of my mom, one of the dreams she couldn’t fulfill and carried a photo of her to the summit.
You often hear about people living in the moment. But that’s a hard thing to do. Not to mention this year, when we are all trapped at home (or in my case, currently in quarantine), and longing for life to get back to normal. And we can all feel our own version of disappointed, sad, and frustrated about the situation we find ourselves in with the pandemic, and the long list of other challenges happening in the world right now. But maybe this is indeed the best year for all of us to learn how to live in this moment. With the future so uncertain, we have to grab what we can and do what we love.
This is a great time to be a woman that is aging.
It is never too late to start over, to start a new health kick, a new lifestyle, a new relationship. We are only limited by our own fears, insecurities, and restrictions.
I started my own business in 2012. The year before, I could barely navigate my laptop! And these last eight years have taught me just how many opportunities are available to us – with the right amount of dedication and hard work.
Don’t allow anyone to dim your light, or limit your potential.
The truth is we are aging and it’s a great thing. We can be pro-aging and still do all we can to look our best. There is no expiration date on ambition, hope, and great style.
Happy birthday…and I loved today’s post. Aging is so much better than the alternative.
Happy Birthday Jennifer! I love your pro-aging term. If I was in marketing, I would be snagging that term! Aging is certainly a privilege, not to be taken for granted but enjoyed to the max. Enjoy your special day!
Happy Birthday! I’ll be 70 in October. As a musician this plague has been horrible. But I’ve resolved to crawl out of my depressive hole and set a new goal. I’ll start a 100 miles of the Appalachian Trail on 1/3/21. Time now to build fitness and strength for the walk!
I will be cheering you on Mary Jane!! Go for it
Happy Birthday, Jennifer! Wonderful inspirational post!
“A flower does not think of competing with a flower next to it, it just blooms”. It’s a little quote that I read a long time ago. I feel that each of us bloom with our own, very unique collection of life experiences. I still saw the 20 year old girl speaking about her life as she relayed so many amazing stories. It was my 90 year old mother! She cared for herself personally and maintained a daily routine of caring for her appearance but more importantly, she remained “current” with everything going on around her. Her children, grandchildren or great grandchildren could always count on her listening, caring and accepting their life choices.
It’s not all about how we look on the surface but to me, it’s also about how we look out at what’s around us.
It’s a great day to celebrate your beautiful birthday Jennifer!!🎂
Happy Birthday, Jennifer! Great post today about aging. I have a cousin who works in the senior housing field. She has made me aware of the prevalence of ageism in our society. It is such a limiting and degrading bias! I try every day to remember how lucky I am (a relatively healthy and active 77 year old), and I constantly try to learn new things (learned how to play MahJong and playing online twice a week with friends has kept me connected during this pandemic). Best of luck to you in your 64th year!
Happy birthday Jennifer! I’m 69. Since the pandemic, I’ve grown out my super short hair and let it go natural. I’ve been gettI got so many compliments!
I am Thankful every single day! We are so lucky to be where we are! Enjoy
Happy Birthday! I used to look at aging as, “better than the alternative”, you know what I mean.
Never wanted to have my picture taken as I didn’t look the same as when I was in my 30’s or 40’s.
Somewhere in my early 60’s, spending more time with my mom as she was aging, I realized I had some very good genes. She passed at 94. She lived a very full and active life, still living on her own, cooking all her own food, shopping and driving her car. I also realized that attitude and gratitude is what advances us to the next month, year, decade in our lives.
Now, I don’t miss a photo opp with my 6 grandkids. I’ll be 74 in a couple of months & proud of it!
Happy Birthday 🎊🎈🎉🎂🎁❤️
Attitude is everything; clearly your mom set a great example for you & you are setting a great one for your daughter. Happy Birthday, Jennifer, and many more! 🥳
Happy Birthday ! I just celebrated my 68th birthday on August 13th! I would never want to be younger. I had to laugh at your lost year. I did the same thing the year I was 34. I guess age has never been important to me. I have had 36 surgeries and still this side of the grass. Life is good ❤️
Happy birthday. 🎁 WOW! If you put a facial picture starting with your daughter, then you, then your mother, it’s as if you’re one person with a progression of your life. Incredible how much you look alike and all so beautiful!
Have a wonderful day! 😊
Happy Birthday Jennifer. Love your thoughts on this anti aging term. It stinks….. I’m 68. I weigh the same as I did 21 years ago. I’m working every day to look my best so that I can feel good about myself. Taking the time to care about myself let’s me me feel happy with myself. 68 is just a number. Enjoy your year! Love your posts!!!
Happy birthday! I agree, anti is a negative, pro is positive!! Alway enjoy your insight!
Happy Birthday Jennifer! You look fabulous! Enjoy!
Happy Birthday! 64? You’re just a youngster! I am ten years older than you and still feel young on many days. Some not so much but such is life, I’m happy to be alive and take every day as a gift. I love fashion and really try to stay as current as possible. I read your blog all the time and you are an inspiration. I love the way you put yourself out there in Dressing Room Diaries and your tips on buying clothing that work for you.
My husband passed away from a brain tumour when I was 62 and I have learned the value of living each day like it is a gift. You are one of those gifts so please enjoy your day today. You deserve it!
I’m so sorry about your husband, Leslie! It is a gift to have you here with us.
Happy Birthday Jennifer! I am 64 also. The first thing I did on my birthday last November was to ask Alexa to play “When I’m 64” on volume 10. I love your pro-age attitude! Hope your birthday is fabulous!
Happy Birthday to you and me! I’ll be 73 next Wednesday. The virus is still raging, but I have found plenty of joy in home activities. My son and his lovely wife and adorable daughter have spent a lot of time with us this summer, since there was no day camp. I try to maintain my self-care, showered, dressed and bed made by 10 am
P.S. I forgot to mention that I like your new Logo!
I GET SO TIRED OF SEEING ALL THESE GREY-HAIRED CREAKIES WHEN AGING IS MENTIONED ON tv> tHERE ARE PLENTY OF ACTIVE, VIBRANT WOMEN OUT THESE WHOARE IN THEIR LATE 80IES OR 90IES.. Just because a woman has reached a certain age does not mean she is irrelevant! WE should not cut ourselves short!. Glad you posted this timely article. . Stay safe!
I had to laugh at that….we live in an over 55 community and all the ads show gray haired people with 30yr old faces and bodies!
Love this post and the term pro-aging.
Happy birthday!
Happy 64th birthday! My family made a big deal about singing that song to my dad when he turned 64. It seemed so old! He’s now 86 and I’m 62. 64 sounds pretty good now!
My father died at 54, when I was 16, my mother at 54 when I was 22, my eldest brother at 59, my other brother at 64. I will be 64 next year, and anything more than that will be a win. I’m trying to look after myself, and remembering that ageing is a privilege denied to so many. Let’s rejoice in every year.
Happy birthday!
Your Mom was so beautiful. You look like her. I think it was so wonderful that your daughter did that climb to honor her grandmother. She must have loved her so much. Great post today, Jennifer.
Oh I forgot to say Happy Birthday! I can tell I need another cup of tea. Lol. I couldn’t sleep well, so I just got up. I hope you have a fantastic day. I know your daughter will make it very special for you. ❤️
Happy Birthday, sweet friend! What a great message you have for all of us today. Love seeing you, your mother and daughter! You all have the same beautiful smile!!
They sure do.
Thank you Pam! Xx
Happy Birthday! I love this article. I will be 66 in 2 weeks and am as active as ever. I’m trying to learn new things and try new things all the time. Gotta keep up with those grandkids! I am lucky to still have an active happy 86 yo mother. Have a wonderful day.
You are so blessed to have her
Happy Birthday 🎂
Happy birthday!
Great post! How lovely for your daughter to honour your mother that way. I lost my mother days before her 56th birthday so at 61, I have outlived her. My sister and I both cried when we did. Certainly a shock how fast time goes and a lesson to live fully while we can and celebrate the opportunity.