Monday Musings: Back at the Barre, Birds, and Bangs
Happy Monday, ladies! This past week, my daughter talked me into joining her for an adult beginner ballet class. When the teacher asked us to introduce ourselves, I casually mentioned I hadn’t worn ballet shoes in over fifty years.
The words came out of my mouth before I fully processed them, and then I just stood there, blinking. Fifty years? Saying it out loud made me feel like a dinosaur in blue leggings. It was honestly a little shocking. How has it really been that long?
The class was labeled “beginner,” which meant it was too simple for my brain but just challenging enough for my body to stage a protest. My arches threatened mutiny, my big toe cramped (right on cue) the moment I tried to point it, and my arms felt significantly heavier than I recall. I held up better than I expected, but my body certainly filed a complaint the next day. Apparently, those deep hip muscles responsible for turnout haven’t been called into action since the Nixon administration.
Maybe there’s still some muscle memory tucked away in there, but strength? That’s going to be the uphill battle. When the instructor called out the French terms, though, I lit up. I knew exactly what she meant. I was ready for a jeté. In my head, anyway.
The real magic was the live pianist. That detail alone transported me straight back to my childhood ballet classes at age six. I can still picture my teacher, Janet Baldwin, gliding around the studio with a wooden stick, gently tapping us into better posture. Those memories feel closer than they have any right to…like they happened last week, not five decades ago.
It’s strange how quickly time passes, yet how clearly some moments remain.
And yes, you may spot me in blue leggings in this photo—but let me explain. I arrived in jeans like a sensible adult. I only wore the leggings back to the car because I was too exhausted to change. I shuffled out, dragging my tail feathers, and drove home that way, fully exhausted, but oddly delighted.
Before ballet class, we stopped for a short forest walk…because why not add a little birdwatching to a day already scheduled to humble me?
I was wearing jeans and my favorite Athleta tee. I have them in several colors and wear them for Pilates, walking outdoors, going to the gym, and now ballet. It has those clever grippy edges at the hem, so it doesn’t ride up when you move or bend over…which makes it surprisingly perfect for both bird spotting and ballet barre work. Practicality in action.
We pulled up the Merlin bird app (as we do now), and it picked up a Chestnut-Backed Chickadee, Anna’s Hummingbird, and Swainson’s Thrush. We heard them clearly…until we stopped moving. Then silence. I swear these birds know when we’re paying attention.
We never actually see them, just hear their chorus floating around us. But it’s oddly soothing. I’m not a full-fledged birder, but I’m definitely bird-adjacent at this point.
After our walk, I swapped the jeans for blue Vuori leggings and traded my sneakers for ballet slippers. One minute I’m in the forest listening to birds, and the next I’m trying to rise into a relevé without my calves cramping. Just your average Saturday.
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about proportions…not just body proportions, but facial ones. Specifically, where the emphasis goes, and how that changes the whole balance.
I’ve always had a strong jaw (thank you, genetics), but lately it’s feeling more prominent. My hair hasn’t been helping because it’s grown into a one-length shape that lands somewhere between Cleopatra and motorcycle helmet. What it’s not doing is softening anything.
So, I’ve booked a haircut. I think it’s time to return to a few long layers at the crown to add some lift and movement. I’m not looking for a full makeover—just a gentle adjustment to help rebalance the proportions around my face. Something similar to how I wore it back in 2018. The bangs were a bit wispier then, slightly side-swept, and the overall shape just worked better with my bone structure.
Of course, I was bleaching my hair at the time, so it looked and felt thicker—which helped. But that’s the general idea I’m aiming for.
My daughter, who knows both me and the hairdresser, joked that I was going to terrorize him. She’s not entirely wrong. I am a bit neurotic about my hair. But I’ll be very polite—come armed with plenty of reference photos and make sure to skip the caffeine beforehand.
That said, if he tries to give me a mullet (and yes, I’ve been down that road before)… then all bets are off.
This little hair epiphany set off a ripple effect, and before I knew it, I was standing in front of the mirror rethinking my entire makeup routine. I’ve always been a bold-eye, soft-lip kind of woman. Smoky shadow, dark lashes, and something subtle on the mouth—that’s been my comfort zone for years.
Well. Enter Ilia’s soft brown mascara. I tried it on a whim and suddenly everything shifted. It’s a cool brown, just a notch softer than black, and somehow it makes my lashes look defined without shouting. More “gently alert” than “nightclub at noon.” That one little tube sent me down a rabbit hole. I’ve been skipping eyeshadow entirely, reaching for bolder lip color, and wondering who this low-maintenance version of me is—and how long she plans to stay.
FRAXEL PROGRESS
A few of you have kindly asked how my Fraxel treatment went, and the honest answer is… it’s too soon to tell. Fraxel is one of those “be patient, trust the process” things, which is not my strong suit. The results are supposed to appear gradually over a few months, and most people need multiple sessions.
I had the procedure on August 22…here I am for the first 4 days after.
I iced my face several times a day and kept it slathered with moisturizer. The swelling was the worst on day 1,2, and 3. Day 5 is when the peeling started and even that wasn’t as bad as I expected. If there’s a dramatic improvement, you’ll be the first to hear about it. And if not—well, you’ll hear about that too. I’m not here to pretend everything works miracles. (Btw- the green you see on my face on day 3, is the Phyto Corrective Mask my dermatologist suggested which is really soothing.
So that’s where my head is this Monday…on feet that are fifty years older and not entirely thrilled about being back in ballet slippers, birds I can hear but never quite catch a glimpse of, a Cleopatra haircut nearing retirement, a soft brown mascara that’s flipped my usual routine, and a face that’s recovering from Fraxel and politely keeping me waiting for results.
What’s swirling in your thoughts this week?
How did you get your top to stay up on one side?
It was not intentional, but the sticky strips on the inside of the hem, just grab where you put them
What a brilliant thing to do Jennifer to go back to Ballet. I loved hearing how it all started to come back to you. When I was little I used to watch my mother do yoga (she was amazing)and so I picked it up myself later and practiced for many years. To save money I stopped going to classes a couple of years ago, and took up a fitness regime at home, but I am going to Australia soon to see a dear friend and I know she wants me to go to a local class with her! Will be interesting….I enjoy these moments when history and time collide and your body remembers the moves, and redoing what you once loved. All part of you !
Yes! Have a great trip. It sounds fun.
Nightclub at noon- love it! The mascara sounds good, I will give it a try.
Oh boy, I can relate to everything you wrote about. If I had the money, I’d love to get a face lift. Not a Kardashian kind, but a gentle lift to look a bit firmer. Ballet, actually sounds like fun. I take Zumba classes. Not similar at all, but at least I’m moving. Over the years, my eyelashes have gotten so sparse. I got eyelash extensions. I love them . They look very natural.
Thanks for your thoughtful posts.
Moving is what’s important.
I love your hair in 2018- it looks so flattering –
I hope your new haircut looks just as good, if not better.
Best of luck.
Me too. I hope my new stylist can copy it
You had some great musings this week. I love sitting on my back deck listening for birds with the Merlin app open. It’s amazing the birds it catches but I never see. Hair…it is our crowning glory and also probably one of my most frustrating to actually love my style😃 maybe call me fickle.
Hi, Jennifer. I too have recently switched to a brown mascara from black, and am much happier with my everyday makeup look. Frankly, most days it’s just lipstick (red or rose) and the mascara immediately following the moisturizer. It’s just enough to add some brightness and keep me from looking washed out. Good luck with your ballet class. I’m taking up playing flute again (and revising music theory) after too many years of not playing. Maybe one day I’ll be able to play long phrases again. I hope you have a good week and look forward to seeing your updated hairstyle.
How fun!
Jennifer you always make me smile! Love your 2018 hair!
Happy Monday
Jennifer, I loved your blog today! I quit ballet at age 17 and I’m 80 now so I really had fun reading your blog to my husband who turned 84 today! We are both slim and active for our ages. It is cooling down here in Colorado but not quite sweater weather yet. I’m so ready. I can’t believe that your condo floor renovation is still not finished! What are they doing? We had 1800 square feet of floor put into our house three years ago including removing carpet and tile to put in new subfloor and light colored oak look LVP floors. They did it in a week and a half! I love your hairstyle in the 2018 photo! I got tired of hair blowing in my face all the time and went short, really short.
They are so disorganized it is dragging and dragging on!
Firstly, I love your Cleopatra cut! The other looks great too, but the cleo cut gives off a sporty vibe.
I just got the Tower 28 brown mascara you and your daughter recommended, and I love it. That will now be my go-to mascara.
And I love that burgundy sweater….I remember seeing it a while ago, but can you send the link again? Thanks.
And one other thing…I remember the name of my ballet teacher from the 1960s….Vera Allen! Thank you for the trigger.
Amazing how our memories can kick in. This sweater is sold out sadly
So funny–I recently went from bob to shag/layers which makes my hair look SO much more full. I also revisited my choice of root lifting spray. I had tried out the new-ish K18 volumizing root lifter but discovered I prefer my older Kenra Root lifting spray for real lift/volume. Couple that with Redkin Big Blowout heat protectant and a little VERB ghost oil (on wet hair before the blowdry), and my new volumed style makes me happy!
It sounds fabulous!! Fingers crossed my stylist can create magic.
Guess the real thing is that we are very lucky to be getting older and in good health even if our body doesn’t like doing the things we did years ago. I am with you on that one. Love the Merlin app. !! Have a good day°
I had to chuckle when I read about your experience with the Marlin bird identification app. I have often said that they know when I pull out my phone. Sudden silence!
I do so enjoy reading your musings.
Yes!! It’s uncanny
Thank you for being so brave showing your Fraxel photos. I remember sharing a terrible Roseaca breakout pic with a long distance girlfriend. She said wow…I had no idea! I find it amusing how other people think we are and do everything so perfectly. Of if they only knew! Sharing our true selves is definitely being confident in who we are. I look forward to seeing your new hairstyle.
I just hope I don’t see them on Pinterest:)
Love your 2018 style, because it’s still in style that is the look I’m trying to achieve with my stylist, we are on the way, though I take care of the white roots every four weeks…I’m going to try a brown mascara, my go to is a deep black..but for everyday brown might work…..
I enjoyed reading your poignant note today. Congratulations on starting ballet after many years, this is an inspiration. I can relate to blurting out the truth and then wishing I held a little back — but that’s what I am like 😂. I will be purchasing that brown mascara because I have a low maintenance look. I used to wear eye makeup everyday in my 20’s but then developed a sensitivity to it. Now, I can only tolerate it occasionally for special occasions. I understand the importance of one’s hair to feel good. I am so lucky to have found a hairdresser who is excellent and with 50 years experience. She gives me a blunt cut with some long layers at the sides and back. This works really well with my fine hair. I’m also wearing a full bang these days but still has lightness due to my fine hair texture. Since I have been going to my hairdresser these past 20 years, every day has been a good hair day. Good luck with your quest for a style that works for you.
I am being packed by movers today and I sat down for a few minutes to get out of their way. Reading your Monday Musings gave me laughs that I really needed today. As someone with the same problem , I completely understand being somewhat neurotic over thinning hair. That seems to be the one beauty issue that is the hardest to fix. I do love your hair in the 2018 photo.
Good luck and hang in there Marian
Your ballet class sounds so fun! It’s probably been 50 years for me too. I loved dance lessons. I had to quit toe dancing because my feet just couldn’t take it. My cousin and I are actually talking about taking tap dance lessons again. Such great memories. I really like your hair in the 2018 picture.
I have thoroughly enjoyed today’s musings. Thank you for helping me smile and feel less alone while facing the “getting older” challenges.
I’m looking forward to seeing the results of the visit to your hairdresser.
Chris in the uk
We are all in this together Christine! I’m glad you’re here.
I really like the 2018 cut as well, very pretty.
I tried the Ilia mascara after you mentioned your preference, however too much of it appears on my under eye area as the day wears on. I don’t wear foundation, only moisturizer and my skin isn’t oily, so not sure why it doesn’t work for me.
Kudos on the ballet tho!
I enjoyed your question and answer from yesterday’s post.
I’m happy to hear that Jane. I wanted something that would just be for subscribers.
Your photo from 2018 is beautiful and the hair is perfect. You are very brave to try the recent facial treatment. I hope it exceeds your expectations.
I also had the Fraxel laser treatment and can confirm it’s quite painful. My doctor explained that it’s essentially a thermal burn—so be prepared. It took several months for the redness to fade, but the outcome was noticeably smoother, healthier skin. I also had filler added to my nasolabial folds, which improved my appearance. Wishing you the best on your journey—I personally found it worth the discomfort.
LOVED this post!! – I can relate to all of it – I’m also “bird adjacent” thanks to the Merlin app! -forest bathing and bird watching just go together!! – As Sam Bush has written, “Birds do not exist to be mastered, but to be marveled at.” The joys of bird watching, it seems, derive from receiving rather than earning, passivity rather than activity.”
I love that Jill♥️
Jennifer, I had to chuckle about the ballet. I took a beginner ballet class in my senior year at BU. I had taken a few classes as a child, but then the studio closed, and perhaps with students like me, that was all that they could do. Anyway, I enjoyed the class to a certain extent, but quickly realized that hand/foot coordination was not my strong suit. AND if my feet were relaxed and did the right thing, my hands were tense as could be. I’m a pianist, and pedals and piano keys work well, but not ballet! When I went home for a weekend, and was demonstrating a ballet position to my Mom, she laughed. Not being mean, but basically because ballet and I were never a good match! Be kind to your body, and enjoy your class!!
I had several years of piano lessons as well, and can only play chop sticks!
Well Jennifer I feel your pain for ballet. I too decided after fifty years to go back to ballet and tap, however I was too embarrassed to say fifty so I went with 30 years. I took an intermediate class and hobbled home. I did stick with it and glad I did. Then I decided to take tap classes which I was best at and loved it. Having danced semiprofessional I did miss my dance and at 77 years old I feel very fit. Don’t give up and you will not be sorry. By the way since I started dancing when I was three it might of been more then fifty. Oh well who’s counting!
lol, I love this Julie
Love the pic from 2018. I like that style, looks beautiful and elevated. Although, your longer length looks very nice too. I think my hair stylist cringes when she sees my name on her appointment book. Every time I go(every 5 weeks) I’m changing up base color and cut! It challenges her talents.
lol, I think it’s fun to mix things up.
Jennifer I appreciate your openness with all of us.
I identify with your reaction to the time since you were last in a ballet class.
I went my 60th college reunion LAST year! Yikes! But to put it in perspective, I work with a personal trainer twice a week and am looking forward to ski season.
Amazing! You go!
I love your Monday Musings, especially when they are as diverse as this – and the description of your return to the barre made me chuckle! Thanks for sharing!
Good morning, good for you to get back to ballet. Not an easy task for sure. However, we all know movement is so important as we age.
Like you I had let my greyish white hair grow into a short bob. Even with regular shaping , I definitely found it very difficult to style and was not happy with it.
In July I did go back to layers and added blond low lights, I have had so many compliments and super happy with my new look.
Have a great day!
Good for you!
Hi Jennifer,
Looking forward to your new hair cut, as we age a tweak here n there goes a long way.
Well Done with the ballet class!
Good Morning, Jennifer, and thank you for helping me start my Monday with a smile and a nod of acceptance to my high D (or red if you use colors) personality. I loved this post. It struck just the right chords for me – especially the part about foregoing coffee before a potentially stressful conversation (followed closely by taking my anxiety out on my hair and my body objecting to barre work). Wishing you a happy day filled with bird sounds AND sightings.
Oh I’m a high D for sure. I’ll have to look up the colors but red seems about right!
Jennifer, you make me laugh. Your description of your adult ballet class was a hoot. If you find yourself too weak to continue, you might want to try strength training. I go to the Y every few days and do the strength training circuit. It is easy and it has made a tremendous difference in my upper body strength. In addition, my balance could not be better. I love that tennis bracelet!
P.S. I worry about you staying in an apartment that is under construction! Not good for your health.
We left for a short road trip yesterday. I just had to get away. The stress of it was really wearing me out.
I love that 2018 haircut on you. I am 70 years old and have been struggling with how my hair should be styled. I am tall and
this adds another challenge of balancing my hair style with my height. And I am very active with my dogs, so opt for a pony tail for ease and to keep my hair out of my eyes. Your 2018 cut is
an inspiration.
The 2018 haircut is very flattering on you! Bobs are almost too common on women our age. Little tweaks to our style and routines keep life interesting. Enjoy ballet…cramping toes and all!
Good Morning Jennifer: Another great Monday Musings. I’m a fan of Ilia products and you’ve inspired me to skip the black mascara next time and try that brown. Love your birdwatching walk. My husband and I are avid birdwatchers and over the years have led field trips for Denver Audubon and Denver Field Ornithologists. I’ve not used the Merlin app, but do like The Sibley Guide on my phone. It won’t identify the song but is a good guide to replay what you’ve heard to confirm. I’m going to a new hairdresser on Tuesday. My strong jaw needs to be addressed and I need a little more length. I truly believe my former hairdresser age profiled me, keeping my hair at a length that annoyed me and was not flattering. I want a longer blunt cut with layers. Wish me luck.
Good luck!! We do get age profiled and it annoys the daylights out of me.
Jennifer….you brought on a few chuckles this morning! Thank you!
I can’t wait to hear how ballet class goes! I have the application for an adult class near me, but haven’t taken the plunge. Good for you!
Just love the 2018 haircut! I plan on showing your picture to my stylist. She and I are finding that my hair has changed with increasing age; I now have curls where I never did, so I’m beyond frustrated. Fingers crossed she can replicate your style as it’s lovely.
Thanks for sharing the Fraxel pics: I’m anxious to line up a session for myself based on your experience!
I am struggling with my hair. The cut is just not working
I am thinking some soft layers too!
Good luck. Hair can be so frustrating!
Jennifer, you have beautiful outfits, but I love you on your pink tee, jeans, and sneakers in the forest. You look so calm and comfortable.
I believe we have similar hair and I am always trying to improve it.
I love the photo of your hair in 2018- I am going to save the photo and copy!
Thank you for your honest, down to earth musings. I can so relate to many of them.
Mona
I absolutely loved today’s Monday Musings! And I can totally relate to the Cleopatra hairstyle. I need to do something different too when I get back home from Spain. I look forward to seeing your new hairstyle!
Have a wonderful week!
Have a great trip!
Good morning, I stopped using eyeshadow about 2 years ago. It wasn’t a decision, it just happened and I didn’t realize until I was looking for a brighter shade foundation. You know, the sales person always will ask, need a new shadow? Never occurred to me to use a soft brown mascara, I’m going to look for it today! Have a good day and HAPPY FALL🍁
The last 15-20 years ago , I have been wearing brown mascara, It used to be very hard to find. I am very fair and black mascara has been too harsh for me.
Enjoyed your description of your return to ballet, only because it brings memories of my return to some exercises that I can’t do without pain, oh me.
I can also relate to your hair challenge, if I could only get the cut I enjoyed a few years ago back again. The best always
Jennifer….I’m curious about the pain level of the fraxel procedure…..10 being worst , how would you rate. I’m a redhead and pain hits me a little differently.
They put numbing cream on so it was quite tolerable. About a 3 during the process.
Hi Peggy, I am two weeks into my first fraxel treatment, and my last. I was not expecting it to be that painful, felt like two razor blades going over my skin. Yes they numb your face for about an hour before the treatment, and that lasts for another two hours after it is finished. My face was very red and swollen after. I had trouble driving home, my eyes were almost swollen shut. I did the fraxel for toning and collagen. The treatment took 20 minutes and I had to ask them to give me a second to catch my breath. Guess everyone is different, not hoping I get some positive results from one treatment.
Wow! I guess they had the Fraxel intensity turned down for me. Sorry yours was so hard. I had a microneedling treatment like that about 4 years ago. Brutal!!