The Edit
We talk about downsizing our home and clearing out our wardrobe, but what about editing other things. I’m talking about books we’re not overly fond of, television shows we watch out of habit or boredom, hobbies, and experiences we repeat that gives us no joy, and yes, people.
Current circumstances have forced an edit of the people we spend time with. This has me wondering if this isn’t a great time to re-evaluate what you keep in your life?
I’ve had plenty of time to go through some boxes in my garage, and while I love books, I’ll be donating monstrously large piles of them, once the donation centers are back open. There’s no need to keep a book I read years ago and had to force myself to finish.
My wardrobe is getting the biggest edit because I’m in the process of getting my colors redone again by several experts and expect to need an update. I want higher quality garments that I will wear with delight rather than mere pleasure. I’m hoping to fine-tune my things to own less but of higher quality.
I also don’t want to needlessly waste time on activities and people I really don’t enjoy. Life is so much more than the things we own and if nothing else, this time at home has reinforced how precious our time is.
Editing out what isn’t important gives you more time for the things that are.
What have you edited from your life lately?
Be well and remember to wear what makes you feel confident.
Wow! Every one of these comments struck a cord with me. I really need to put some serious thought into my need to surround myself with things. I love to shop but just because it’s cute or on sale doesn’t mean it should be mine. Lots of work to do! Thanks for the inspiration Ladies.
My husband & I downsized drastically several years ago. But since we’ve been on lockdown, I’ve realized that even when you live in a small space you can still accumulate unneeded items! So we’re done another purge. Now that my area is reopening, we can donate these items that we put into bags a few weeks ago. I enjoy the feeling of releasing what no longer serves me, especially when someone else might be looking for the exact item I’m donating!
Jennifer, how do you find someone who can do your colors? My wardrobe is small now so I’d like to have each piece be perfect for me.
I am trying out several online colorists right now and will share my results very soon.
Thank you so much for this post. So many of the comments resonate with me, such as: Too much stuff, what am I shopping/gathering constantly for, saving things for my kids that they don’t even want, sick of looking at it all (cleaning, maintaining, organizing and reorganizing it all), desire to enjoy things more instead of thinking about what I need to “get to” someday, too many choices, lifestyle has changed and don’t need certain things, and on and on.
And as for the topic of people, after moving clear across the country 10 years ago, I found that few friends were willing to stay in touch beyond social media… which makes me ponder these relationships. Social media seems (for some people) like a way to “collect” more and more friends with less and less real relationship. So I’ve also been paring down there too.
I know I’m not saying anything new here in my comment… but I just want to say that I also think we’re on to something, gals. Each in her own way and in her own time… but we are all reaching for our best life!!
Lastly, thank you Jennifer for your wonderful articles on style. It has helped me shape my view of clothing/fashion beyond my “it’s on sale so get it” mentality to thinking about the important factors such as does it look good on me, does it fit my lifestyle and budget and more.
Thank you Marce. I’m so glad you’re part of our community here!
This is such a timely topic. Last August, I started the process of downsizing my parents household items so they could move into an apartment that is attached to their home. My brother will renovate their house for him and his wife over the next 6 months. I am visiting them this week to move them into the apartment. This taught me that we accumulate a LOT of stuff, much of it unused. When I returned home, I took a hard look at my house and realized that I need to start working on downsizing now so that when I retire in 10 years I am not overwhelmed. I also decided I did not want to spend time caring for and maintaining stuff I don’t need or use. I did start with wardrobe and accessories. I started selling the stuff that was in good condition on Poshmark. It has been gratifying to know that it is not going into a landfill. I watched the documentary, The True Cost, on how fashion is the second most polluting industry behind oil and gas – it was eye-opening. Several folks who purchased items from me on Poshmark wrote nice notes that they were starting their first job and purchased the item as part of their work wardrobe. I have worn out some items and thrown those and stained or torn items away. And I have donated some items that are in good condition, but get little wear or don’t feel like me any more. I am more discerning in what I do purchase. I continue to edit. I am preparing for a move in August back to Southern California from Las Vegas – this will be my last job before I retire. My goal is to reduce my book collection over the next few years by reading and donating to libraries. Household goods will continue to be edited. The ultimate goal is a home that is welcoming and inviting, clean and free of clutter and has only items used and loved. Once I do retire, my last move will be easier with fewer possessions. I have enjoyed all the comments and love this community.
Thanks for being part of this community Pat
Thank you for an excellent and thought provoking post, Jennifer. Like many others, I’ve done some much needed “editing” while sheltering at home. I started by cleaning out and reorganized my kitchen cabinets and our storage room. The items that were culled are waiting for our local thrift store to reopen so that they can be donated. The bookshelves are next. I know that I’ll find them more challenging as I hate to part with a book, but you are so right! What is the point in keeping books that we’ll never read again? People are even harder to edit than books, but the divisiveness that I’m seeing online these days makes it very clear to me that there are a few that I need to cut ties with. That brings me to the final area that I know needs some editing in my life… social media! I’ve come to realize that it eats up too much of my time and often leaves me totally frustrated. I’m currently reading Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World by Cal Newport in hopes that it will help me figure out how best to edit this part of my life.
Thanks for the book suggestion, Elaine. This sounds exactly like what I need. I have been thinking about Facebook lately and get discouraged and sad. I have so many beautiful, wonderful friends and family that I hate to give it up entirely. I’ll order this book today.
I was overwhelmed 10 years ago and sat down and made a long list of everyone and everything that wanted or demanded my time and attention. It was a ridiculously long list. I spent a weekend compiling a list of essential people in my life and work priorities (I’m self-employed) and was amazed at how much was left “unprioritised” on the list. I made some harsh decisions that weekend, but I have never regretted those decisions. Moving house after an earthquake solved my dilemmas about what stuff needed to be saved and what could go! Upshot? Keep kind and loving people around you and less “stuff”. Go well Jennifer
My edit? It’s going to be my yoga class. Why? I found that I like attending the class online better. I can pick the time I want to watch it plus it saves me gas. With regard to books, I’ve discovered the library’s app where I can borrow books on my Kindle, so there aren’t books in my house I need to give away. With regard to clothes – well – I really still like to browse through catalogs and have new things to wear. My trick is that I look through the catalog, write down every thing I want and then come back to the list in a few days. By that time I’ve changed my mind and usually don’t even order anything. But it was fun to look!
Sandy, Would you be so kind to explain how to use the library app and if I can borrow books to read on my” kindle for pc ” ? I would love to be able to go this route…. I just moved to a different state bringing 9 boxes of books (some hardcover & some paperback) and am wondering now if I can locate my desert island favorites (2 shelves full) digitally, then let’s sell/donate/put in little free libraries the books! *****OR if Jennifer knows how to do this– can you please post soon?
For my most recent edit– I sold my 10 year old vehicle to Car Max end of May when I decided to move to a pedestrian friendly city.
I moved far too many books last time. I did donate tons to my library when they were accepting them. The rest went to Goodwill. They love getting books and I’m more than happy to donate.
Of course, my “edit” was done by an arsonist who set the forest on fire and burned down my house and seven others in my neighborhood. Let me offer some reflections: I find that I am strangely relieved that all that junk in the garage I was going to “get to” is now gone. All the clothes I bought on whim and regretted are gone, along with the guilt I felt for not wearing them. The baby pictures and other childhood stuff I had recently doled out to the kids is safe in their houses and I don’t need to worry about keeping them safe in my house. I lived in fear for 30 plus years of a fire in our fire-prone area, and now I don’t worry about that anymore. I had some neighbors who were “troublesome,” but now I don’t have to think about them ever again. A few years ago, I had gathered up small family heirlooms and stored them elsewhere. Those things I still have. I had put all kinds of things “in the cloud,” so that stuff still exists. I did lose many things that I can never replace, but my family is safe. That is the most important thing. (I know that has become almost a cliche, it really is true.)
If you want to edit your life, do it now. Don’t wait until circumstances do it for you. You may find that the “stuff” you couldn’t part with is the “stuff” you won’t miss.
Today I am wearing a shirt which has shrunken in a most unusual way — just the sleeves, and a lot. Since sleeve fit is critical for my long arms, I think it would be the perfect face mask material. This is just the encouragement I needed to get out the scissors. Editing my wardrobe, literally. I’ll wash it first.
I haven’t finished all the posts but I intend too. It is sad how we start out with good intentions to purge and then a couple of years, back it comes. I became a minimalist a few years ago and got off track. Now I need to do it again. We didn’t miss anything we got rid of either. I guess out of sight out of mind is true but we replaced it with other things. I didn’t bring the books or the crafts back in or even kitchen items or decor. I brought back in clothes however. Time to revisit the clothes I really wear and dump the ones I don’t. You have to stay focused on what not to bring home.
This was a very thought provoking article. Due to the recent times we are living in and having the extra time at home, I have also been downsizing my wardrobe and household. I too only want to make future purchases of articles in the best quality I can afford, in styles and colours that I am certain look best of me. I don’t want or need a packed closet full of clothes that I don’t regularly wear or am confident I look good in. I may have to find a way to have a colour analysis done as well, as I’m not 100% confident that I do know what looks best on me. I check the news to keep up with current events, but have stopped watching the nightly news as these unsettling times cause me to be anxious and then don’t sleep well. I prefer instead to relax with a good book. I’m trying to be more assertive (which is not my natural nature) to say no to things I do not want or feel comfortable with, or surround myself with others who I really do not enjoy spending time with. My husband and I have embarked on trying to be more active and healthy. We make a weekly menu and spend time cooking supper together, and take our dog for a sixty minute walk each day. I also have begun doing an online exercise workout for seniors (I’m sixty) a few mornings a week which I’m loving. Spending more time at home and in my yard has actually been a bit of a blessing. I’m thankful for what I have and only want to keep what makes me happy. Excess does not make me happy, only causes me stress. My husband does not always agree with what I think we need to toss or donate, but I’m happy if we can agree on most things. Happiness to me is family, good friends who share the same values as you do, and thankful for what you have. Sometimes, happiness does mean editing possessions and even people in your life that don’t fit those qualities.
May I ask, which senior workout you do on line? I’ve been following Jenny McLendon and love it…she also caters to seniors…
Thanks
This was a very thoughtful article. I really enjoyed it and the remarks by the readers. I downsized four years ago when I retired and moved to be closer to family. This downtime has been constructive in that I have completed the chores that kept hitting the bottom of my to do list but has also been a relief in not having to be so heavily involved in activities and running around. I have been doing the things I enjoy and not the things I feel I must do and that has lifted a lot of stress from my life. I have had time to watch the birds and their you and even laugh at the family of three squirrels even as they have deconstructed my potted plants. Plus I have been so enjoying the telephone calls to my cousins now that we have time to reconnect.
This post was timely and to the point, Jennifer. Very well done! And the comments have allowed me to feel in good company with so many ladies feeling the same as I. My husband and I downsized years ago and have made carefully thought out purchases to keep our home streamlined and simple. It is refreshing and…much easier to clean! I so enjoy reading your posts everyday. Thank you!
I made a decision to use up and wear out the clothes I already have before buying more and then slowly curate a new higher quality/spark joy wardrobe.
I’ve been spending most of my SIP time gardening and DIY home improvements. Somehow everything gets a stain or bleach spot! When did I get so messy? Now is the time to wear all those t shirts that don’t spark joy, the purple summer dress I wasn’t crazy about and the cool light cotton skirt that puckers in a funny place.
I bought a few quality classics that were drastically reduced for next winter. You can’t go wrong investing in a few quality basics and there has never been a bigger selection and in all sizes. The plan is to do another big closet purge around Labor Day and toss all the unloved, stained and worn out clothes.
I believe that retailers will continue having good sales for many months. They will have to liquidate all that surplus that was on order before the pandemic. There in no more urgency buying for an event or a trip or office clothes for those who work. It’s a great time to carefully curate what you really love at much lower prices.
I have been binge watching Hoarders and Marie Kondo’s show Tidying Up. Quite frankly, not much of my stuff “sparks joy”. I don’t want to leave a lot for others to deal with either. I want to convert the kids rooms into guests rooms but I’m stuck. Too many memories. Too much stuff.
Sometimes I take pictures of the “precious stuff” and then let it go. Works for me, not so much for my husband. Good luck with the task. 🌺
I was going to suggest the same thing! Good luck!
the posts about the closets are close to my mind today, i retired early in April, they offered insurance and i jumped on it at 63, its all i needed to be happy at home…but when i go in my closet i just cringe…where on earth is all this stuff going to be worn now….i bagged up about 5 shopping bags full and as soon as my donation site opened, i dropped them off. went thru the shoes, and anything worn well was given up…there is still a lot in there…and i have stopped cold with my online shopping. i still browse, but my mind is made up, if i dont absolutely love it or need it, i gotta pass on it.
I am slowly getting rid of things one trash bag at a time. I just retired from teaching last month so the first thing I did was to donate all but a couple of my school t/shirts to give to any of the remaining teachers who might want one. I am throwing out as much as I can but my husband recently developed Sudden Onset Dementia and he can at times be greatly opposed to my cleaning out things we do not need. I just wait until he is busy with something else and go back. Once done, he actually likes what I just did. It’s all in how I approach it and timing. It’s ok, I now have all the time in the world to get this doe… one trash bag at a time!
My husband wants to keep everything so I bag things up when he’s not around too 🙂